~Rissalla

It has to be very boring for me to start writing a jurnal, but without any aristic inspiration, and beeing online, so here I am.
I have just been thinking that it is a pitty that one you put only one mood emoticon, because simply tired dosent describe my present mood. I am Tired, Bored and Frustrated.

Tired because I didn't sleep enough last night and reason to that is a shitty worker I had to meet this morning. He is what made me frustraded, as well. He had a nerve to tell me that he will not finish the contracted job if I'm late. After another comment of his, said in a too familiar way than some lowly idiot is allowed to adress me, this morning - "You have not slept to meet me on time," I have told him "I have slept just fine, SIR, and go and screw yourself!!" I think I overreacted, now that I think on it, but what the hell, the lowlife deserved it. (I should change the mood in frustrated, though).

Here at my aunts, everybody is cleaning one thing or another, and me to tire (not to mention lazy) i am rather bored. I looked at my work-in-progres novel and I was just blankly looking at the screen, two hours of sleep are not enough to rejuvinate my imagination.
I think I will be posting some chapters online, but only finished chapter is, i think, fourth or so, so I will start as soon as I finish one of the prologues or chapter one. I am like Gustave Flaubert, all that I have by now is yust a rough - all will be rewritten about a thousand times before it's finished. (btw, my mood is changeing again - I am becoming... content. I should seriously cosider seeing a shrink) To get back on the road, I had this thought: If I don't allow anyone to read my scraps, then I will never know all of my mistakes, so soon enough I will post it online, and we'll see.

I have a friend in Pula, whe used to be roommates in highschool, who always complained about my "laconica brevitas". And until not long ago, I did write only short messages (both email and SMS), when, two weeks ago I wrote one mile long e-mail she was positively shocked. To my standards of lenght, this jurnal post is very long.

Until the next spare and boring moment.